As a 21 year veteran to the Christian faith, you would think I get this “building God’s kingdom” thing. And if someone were to ask me if I had it down a few years ago, I would have agreed. “Yeah, I know what it means to build God’s kingdom.” But the funny thing about God is that as much as He looks at the efforts of the hands, He weighs the motives of the heart, more so. So, within the last couple years, I have been forced to look at the mirror of my life and ask the question, “Why do I do what I do?” Is it really for God? I would often say so, but the truth of the matter is, there is a very real, selfish, and therefore, sinister reason. I puff myself up. I want the accolades. I want the praise. I want to know that I am making a positive impact in someone’s life. I want to know that I found worth in someone’s life. I want to be the hero. Wait. But isn’t this supposed to be about Jesus? Absolutely, yes. Of course, I want people to be saved from their sins. Of course, I want them to have a relationship with our Father in heaven. But I also want it to be known that it was me who led them to Christ. Sheesh. The truth oozes with pride. My very cursed pride (appropriate time for a specific cuss word?). So, even though it’s by Jesus’ name, it is duly noted that it is my own kingdom that I seek to build. It is no secret that I have struggled with self-esteem. I’ve blogged about it before, but seeing it’s long-awaited result can make me sick concerning the reality of what might be. As long as I have deemed it necessary to rebuttal the verbal or written attacks on my identity, I can only focus on my own worth, rather than on the worth of God. And because I am guilty of seeking my own glory, I fail to glorify God. I wonder how often I have shared a testimony, and it overemphasizes what I have done, but, “Oh Jesus stepped in at this one moment, and helped it along…” Yeah, sure. Honestly, it is very easy to forget to give any credit to Him at all. Sheesh. I’m not as clean as I think I am. There really isn’t too much to wonder why there was a need for a season of rest. How am I to share the love of God if all I am concerned about is how people care about me? I can’t. Luckily, I’m catching it now. However, sooner or later, if undeterred, the motives of my heart would muddle the very notion of why ministry is conducted. I would focus on works, again. I would have a hopeful heart, at first, but burn out. My unconditional love would reveal itself to be conditional. Friendships would be dependent, and not mutually caring. I would get jealous if someone else received affirmation, whereas I hadn’t. I know that this would happen, because it started happening. Even before I officially moved into my season of rest, I began recognizing that something was amiss, and perhaps, I needed to step down from ministry. Whether or not I was going to stay in Browning. There are wounds in my heart that need to be healed; mindsets that need to be realigned with God’s Word. There are lies about myself and my life that I have believed. While buried under a rug, I had been proclaiming truths that I now wonder how deeply (or shallow, as the case may reveal) I honestly trusted and believed. I am finding that in my wounds, I have sought for a safe place to share my faith. I’ll be bold in my writings and among my friends, but ask me to talk to someone beyond my immediate circle; ask me to pray for healing; ask me to do something out of the ordinary, because God directed me to - I will refuse. My boldness has waned. And it’s because I’ve believed the lies of the enemy. I have failed to be assured in my mind what my spirit knows to be true. I have believed that I’m not worth anything. I have believed that I’m someone’s second choice. I have believed that God won’t answer prayer in a timely fashion. I have believed that the results of a supernatural encounter are dependent on my ability and faith, not on the work of the Holy Spirit. I have believed that I need to prove God real. I have believed that salvation needs to look appetizing to the senses before Jesus can be shared. The truth is, while I’m wanting people to accept Jesus, I’m REALLY wanting people to accept me. Because I have feared my entire life that I wouldn’t be. That I could be thrown away. And being thrown away means more to me than if someone fails to have a relationship with Jesus, and subsequently, spends eternity in hell. Sheesh. Quite a narcissistic desire. But it’s my kingdom I’m building. Unless something changes. And the truth is - I DO want it to change. I want to stop worrying about what people think about me. Furthermore, I want to know how to love God beyond what He can do for me. The failure to chase after His heart is because there has been a desire in me for others to chase after mine. I have become convinced of the world’s promises, and found where my convictions have been compromised. It sucks. All this time, I thought I was close to my heavenly Father and doing great things for Him, only to find out it wasn’t 100% for His glory. What. The. Heck. Was I thinking??? Didn’t I see how God wasn’t at the center of it all? To say that I made some mistakes is an understatement. There is some regret. There is a part of me that wants to just jump back in the waters of ministry. When can I go back to a reservation somewhere, or overseas? Maybe I should get involved in the youth or children’s ministry here. Yet, I’m hesitant to do so. For good reason, too. I have come to realize that I lost sight of my Father’s heart, and I want to get back. And I want to go deeper. I’m sure there is a danger to becoming comfortable spending extensive time with God on an almost daily basis. But it would be far more dangerous to go back sharing the Word of God without His heart or His kingdom in mind. As long as I’m afraid of what others think of me, I’ll be too dang focused on me, rather than on Him. So, it is high time to till the soil, fix the broken things in me...but more importantly, fix my eyes on Jesus, lifting up His kingdom instead of my own. He is to increase. I am to decrease. Let it be so.
Wednesday, September 22, 2021
So, What's the Plan?
I had a plan. I knew what I was going to do come this Fall. Or I thought I knew. Making plans can be a funny thing, because sometimes things happen as one detail, but there are other times when what was envisioned is not so. This Fall is one such instance when the plans I made fell through completely. I already knew the timeline for YWAM shifted. But I was supposed to be going to Israel at the end of August. Then that got delayed to the Spring. It was confirmed that this is supposed to be a season of rest. But what does that even mean? I’m not working, and to the outsider’s mind, I’m just chilling and freeloading off my family. This rest isn’t meant to be permanent, nevertheless, it is amazing how quickly the questions came as to what the plan is for me moving back to Missoula. “Are you going to sub?” “Are you going to teach at DeSmet? (We need tutors.)” “What about Valley Christian?” “Are you going to reapply to YWAM? Maybe you should try another base.” “You should go to Rhema. I feel it in my spirit.” “I heard you’re interested in YWAM. Here’s a contact for Ronan. They are looking for students.” Are you, are you, are you? You should, you should, you should… It can be a bit maddening if I ponder on the expectations that I have felt inwardly pressured. Truth is, however, no one is telling me I have to do something. Most of the questions coming are from people whom I haven’t talked to in a long time, and so they see a new chapter and wonder what’s being written. Nevertheless, when God has revealed to me in a number of ways that I should be sitting tight, it is anxious to see the open doors, when I have been directed to shut them, for the time being. I grew up believing that if there is an open door, I should (there’s that word, again…) walk through it. However, I am finding that when God gives a directive to stop doing, then open doors become a test. Am I going to listen to Him, or am I going to do what I want to do (which is being involved)? Truth is - so much of my maturity in my faith has relied on what I do for God, more than in who I am. And when I told God that I should be about my Father’s business, He then retorted, “What if being about My business is sitting at My feet?” Dang. There it is. I’m so comfortable at being busy than being, in and of itself. So, what’s the plan? For now, just sit at His feet. Learn to address the hidden things in my heart that I have learned to bury over the years. Seek His face and His heart over my personal motivations. The plan is to rest. Rest seems lazy. It can look immature. But there is a purpose in it, when done right. I’m not vegetating. I’m addressing the things that for so long were neglected. I, also, see areas where God is going to stretch me. That is, if I am willing to follow through on the exercises that He gives me. Rest is meant to be active, not dull. But more on that for another time. As for now, I see that there has been a reason for my plans falling through. There is personal growth, but I have also been able to reconnect with family I haven’t seen in years; and am a needed help in other ways. I don’t know what the plans will be come November or December. Will this rest thing only be a couple months, or the length of the school year? Only God knows. But I am in no rush. Maybe that’s a bad thing. Although, maybe it isn’t. Our society pressures us to have a plan and follow a timeclock for certain goals and events in life. But God is the one who writes the story, ultimately. Maybe...instead of writing my own script, it’s time to read His.
Wednesday, September 8, 2021
I Remember...9/11 (20th Anniversary)
I remember 9/11...I was getting ready for school, and heading out to the bus stop. As I was opening the door, my dad had just turned on the TV, and at the sight of emergency news, he said, “Oh ----!” I didn’t know what happened, but I knew it was bad. When I arrived at school, I learned about the World Trade Center, and it was the first time I heard of Al Qaeda. I heard about the Pentagon. I learned of Flight 98 and the heroic sacrifice those passengers made. In subsequent days, words of Muslim extremists, terrorism and Osama bin Laden became frequent. I remember the religion of Islam no longer being mentioned as a religion of peace. I also remember that the United States started banding together. We started praying again. On the news, I also remember hearing word that violent acts were being committed as a reaction to the loss of 3,000 lives. Shops owned by American Muslims were vandalized. President George W. Bush reminded the people that we are not to fight our own. The terrorists were our enemy, and that is who we would fight. I was warned that my classmates may fight in this war. There was fear. There was hurt. There was hope. There was unity. I also remember a thought that came along. It became more prevalent to my heart, however, I wasn’t hearing anyone else utter the same conviction (until a couple years later). Would it be...could it be...is it okay to ask God to pray for bin Laden’s salvation? In a time of war, was it odd to pray that the enemy could find mercy long enough to come to know Jesus? I knew that justice needed to be made. I knew life-long imprisonment, in the least; death at most would be required. But...could God hold off long enough to see our enemies become our brothers? Even if only on a spiritual aspect. But maybe I was just being naïve. After all, I was only an 11-year-old girl.
I remember May 2, 2011… Well, the news came a day after, for us, Americans. Osama bin Laden was found in Pakistan and the Navy Seal charged into his home, killing him and shooting one of his wives in the leg. President Obama was announcing the victory we had wanted since September 11, 2001. The man who supported the attack on America ten years prior was dead. On Facebook, the newsfeed was filled with praises for the dead terrorist. My heart felt a mixture of emotions. On one hand, I knew there was a relief; a sense of justice was achieved. However, my heart also felt heavy. But why? As an American, I should be happy.
Right?
I asked God why I felt this heaviness. His reply: “I lost a son.” In that moment, I remembered my prayer when I was a child. I had wanted Osama bin Laden to meet Jesus on this side of death. But he didn’t. Now Osama bin Laden was burning in hell. And that is for eternity. How could I relish in his death when it meant that he would never get another chance to know God as a heavenly Father? I could not.
Two blasts blew at the Kabul airport in Afghanistan on August 26, 2021...Thirteen US soldiers were killed, up to 90 other Afghan citizens were killed, and 120 others injured as there was a plan in place to evacuate American citizens and Afghan allies after the Taliban took over the governing forces in the country. We had been fighting in a war for 20 years. Even two weeks later, the news has ongoing updates on how there are still American citizens stranded in Afghanistan. There is fear. There is hurt. There is not much hope or unity discussed.
In all that has happened in America, and that continues to unfold nationally and internationally, I am hesitant to jump on the “hate the enemy” bandwagon. I’m reminded of my 11-year-old self, and how I was praying for salvation, rather than revenge. When President Biden addressed the nation, he stated one phrase that was repeated across the newscasters: “We will not forgive. We will hunt you down. We will make you pay.” Politics aside (TV is full of opinions on the events of the world; this post is meant to mention something not being discussed publicly), I cannot agree with my president on the notion that I won’t forgive.
I am not going to apologize. But I am not going to allow hate to stir in my heart based on what happened in Afghanistan. Does what happened hurt? Of course. Should something be done. I wouldn’t doubt it. My uncle and I had a conversation last week about this. He believes the death of innocents is close to God’s heart and that there is such a thing as godly killing. In this context, it is okay to respond and bring forth justice to stop evil. Perhaps he is correct. Killing may be required as a form of self-defense. I know that in the Bible and in contemporary times, judgment has come upon those who have done evil.
There is the physical perspective. But there is also the eternal perspective. As an American, I am leery to relish in the destruction of men (and women) who are acting on terrorist means to obtain their end. I do not want to even desire for the demise of the Taliban, ISIS-K, Al Qaeda, or any other Muslim terrorist organization. Even if I have to physically defend myself, I do not want to resort to hatred.
Because as a Christian, I cannot be mindful of the physical realm alone. There is an eternal realm that we must be aware of. There is an enemy greater than the ones we see in planes. And there is a far more sobering reality than dying on a battlefield.
We are trying to fight something with artillery that can only be fought with ideology, furthermore, spiritually. Let’s face it. Even if you kill 100 Muslim extremists, 1,000 may still rise up. Because they believe in the theology of jihad. Of a holy war. They won’t be deterred from their beliefs, as many Christians are not deterred despite persecution.
To beat something spiritually, you must have spiritual weapons. And the prime weapon is prayer.
I feel sad for our nation, but I also feel sorry for these jihadists. They are ensued in a war to bring about a righteousness that they themselves cannot maintain (based on Letters from Osama bin Laden, a book I had to read for my terrorism class, this fight is over Israel (Muslims believe that Ishmael was the promised son of Abraham), oil (which the Western world loved to be involved in), and the sin tolerated in Western societies (which, maybe we Christians should be careful not to call sins vices or tolerate things unbiblical)). According to Muslim law and tradition, they have to pray certain times of day, in a certain language (not every Muslim speaks Arabic), have certain cleansing rituals, and obligations to attend to in life. Even then! When they still adhere to all the requirements Allah dictated according to the Quran, Muslims are at the mercy of their god’s choice.
But Isaiah tells the hard truth that all of us need to come to terms with. Every ‘righteous’ act we attempt to do is as filthy rags (see Isaiah 64:6). The only way we can be cleaned of our nastiness and become righteous is through the sacrifice of Jesus. He died while we were still sinners (Romans 5:5), took our sin upon Himself that we may take up the righteousness of God (2 Corinthians 5:21). I don’t care what religious background you have. None of us can make it to God with our own efforts. That is why we need Jesus. And until we give Him our hearts, we will continue to “earn” our goodness, and attempt to purge the world of any evil and bring a counterfeit justice in our own strength. It is futile.
So back to 9/11’s memory. Back to the Muslim extremists that we are still guarded within our negotiations. We may have to fight. We may have to defend ourselves. Nevertheless, I choose to forgive. I choose to not allow any terrorists to gain my hate. And I choose to pray. Because at the end of it all, I would much rather see brothers than enemies. I want to see those whom I may not know their face or name be able to have a relationship with the One who has known their name and face before time itself.
Am I so naïve?
"Harmless" Daydreaming
I bet you wouldn’t guess that I could be guilty of this sin. I grew up in the church. I’m pretty clean-cut. Would you believe that I have broken the seventh commandment? It says, “Do not commit adultery (see Exodus 20:14).” I’m a clean-cut Christian. So, I’m good...Right? But Jesus said, “You have heard it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; but I say to you that everyone who [so much as] looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart (Matthew 5:27-28).” Wait. So adultery encompasses more than having sex outside of marriage? Maybe I’m not as pure as I thought when I attended college. My journey into the interest of a romance took a belated approach. Boys as a desire didn’t get introduced until I was 15 (any desire for a boy was to beat him at a sport, until then). And when I had my first major crush at 16 years old, I freaked out, because I was of the opinion that if I wasn’t old enough to marry, why date? I told God to take away the desire. Fast forward 15 years, and I am still single. Not even one date. It is easy to be sexually pure if I haven’t been in a relationship. However, the truth is, there is a desire for romance. Has been so since I moved away from my parents the first time. It still persists. It becomes more pronounced the more lonely I’m feeling. However, what I must come to terms with, as a Christian, is why am I okay with the areas or in the manner in which I blur the lines of sin? I don’t have sex. And I know that once I’m in a relationship, I will want boundaries. After God revealed to me in the most practical way what masturbation was, there was an immediate stop. I want to glorify God in this desire. At least, I think so. I say I do. But I am coming to realize there is so much of me that I want to esteem, that I have cleverly found ways in which I can “honor” God, and still allow myself to relish in the hopes for the romantic. I daydream. Primarily when I’m going to bed or waking up. It doesn’t happen all the time, but if a related topic, movie scene or short clip has come up, my mind starts running. I begin to imagine a storyline - I’m the main female protagonist. Of course. The ways in which the story lines vary; most often a readaptation of other romantic stories I have encountered. They are clean. Of course. And by clean, I mean that I make sure there aren’t any sex scenes (I know not to envision myself having sex with someone that isn’t my husband). The couple at most is just laying next to each other. Okay. Honesty here. They are spooning. The couple is either married or the romance leads to marriage. Bed scenes NEVER include a couple not married (although, there was that one story line where the couple accidentally fell asleep on a couch, talking late at night...does that count?). Story lines usually include that the protagonists run into each other and have a common goal. This is a summary of the themes found in these daydreams. On paper, they seem harmless. After all, don’t women watch chick flicks to feel good? What’s wrong with that? What could be lustful about that? This was a common question I have had to ask myself, especially in the last couple years. What is lust? If looking at a person is going to get me in trouble for adultery, how do I navigate this thing called romance in a godly fashion? I came to realize one major distinction. If I am attracted to someone for something that they exhibit, it is okay. However, if my attention is drawn to him, for what he can do for me, then it is lust. After all, lust is self-seeking. Sex is in the context of marriage is a man and woman giving themselves to one another to become one; but sex outside of marriage is giving yourself under the guise to get something. I may have never given myself to anyone, however, I have used my imagination to gain something that wasn’t mine to have. I have found that I am using these daydreams, as well as fixated crushes (let’s call them as they are: infatuations with real men) to meet a need I have. In the last seven months, God has revealed that one of the identities I hold onto is my sexuality. I believe that I must be in a relationship to be convinced that I am loved. Nevertheless, that is only the beginning of the lies in this identity. I have also believed that if there are other women as a choice, I would not be picked. This would explain why in my stories, my protagonist is the only primary female lead in the story. I believe that a man would only be attracted for what I do. This explains why there is a bigger purpose for which the couple is connected (such as saving kids, participating in government).
Still...I find myself falling into this sin. I don’t want to be a person of lust, but I get caught when I’m thinking of a story. No more stories? Maybe. But my mind sometimes wanders, and how to make it stop? In Psalms 28:7, it discusses that the wicked are wiped away, because they don’t regard the Lord. Maybe that’s key. In the moments that my mind wants to stir up love before it’s appointed time, I need to start reminding myself that God loves me already. I need to start esteeming who He is. Maybe if I am satisfied completely in Him, I won’t find myself in want for a man. Real or imagined.
Wednesday, July 21, 2021
The Heart of Missions and the Complexities of Them
The original title of this post was going to be, “Missions: The Danger of Subtle Biases”. That statement alone will give a hint to the nature of what I am going to write. I want to clarify that I am not one who denies the purpose of missions, yet past violences has made the world skeptical of the intent to share the Gospel of Jesus. Many have come to believe that mission work is racist at its core; a form of assimilation in denying the specific identity and characteristics of different people groups. Yet, as a Christian myself, I cannot deny the fact that Jesus charged us to “Go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you (Matthew 28:19-20).” Furthermore, the disciples were also told they should be “witnesses to Me in Jerusalem, and in all of Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth (Acts 1:8).” So, with the recent disclosure of abuses committed by the Church (see articles on mass graves of buried children from residential schools, for example), how do I affirm the Biblical mandate, without repeating the offenses and atrocities of the past?
I grew up in a church that emphasized being on mission. I had gone to three mission trips in high school, and since I was in middle school, I consistently heard about YWAM (Youth with a Mission) as an idea to train in how to be a missionary. Nevertheless, having had taken time to move away from my hometown, and part of my role was to encourage students to grow their relationship with Jesus, I have listened to my community, and found that as nice the intention is to talk of Jesus, subtle biases still subvert the desired means of why one travels, and “goes on mission.”
The truth is, when anyone goes to another place beyond their native culture, they will inherently bring their preconceived convictions, ideas, cultural mores, and personal tastes. In short, many go on missions with the best of heart, but if not careful enough, one can import more culture than Christ. This is in fact, the fault of the missionary movement that paralleled the imperialism period. Jesus was being preached, but simultaneously so was the requirement to become white (whether it meant British, French, Dutch, French or US American) to become proper citizens of the world. Surely there were missionaries who truly desired Christ and Christ alone. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the message always received.
This is not a blogpost to white bash. After all, God made me white. This is also not a blogpost that is to dissuade anyone from doing mission work, especially if God has put it on their hearts to travel. What I intend to do with this article is to discuss what the modern mindset of Western missions seem to be, expose where certain mindsets may be harmful, share from Scripture what missions are meant to be, and lastly, how one does missions. I want to be upfront that these are my thoughts based on much reflection and conversation with my friends and family who are Native (i.e. not Western). I will readily admit that I, myself, may still have biases. And perhaps some may disagree. Some may agree. I will not promise that this post is to be an answer-all to the paradox of modern missions. My intent is to share and perhaps strike a much needed conversation on what it means to share Christ with our neighbors and brothers.
Western Mindsets on Missions
Where has the focus of missionary journeys been?
Frankly, for well-off Americans, we look to serve. And we look to serve those who may have less fortune then ourselves. International missions have focused on the poor and underprivileged. We take pity on their “sorrowful” plight, and want to do whatever we can to help them out of their misery. Much of the mission work that is done, there is a focus on the physical need of the person.What is a mission trip?
A set of time taken to travel and live with a group of people, not native to your own. This can be a temporary situation (such as the infamous “short-term mission trips”), or a longer, more permanent move. However, using the term “trip” hints at a short term. Short term mission trips can range from a week to several weeks, typically. The purposes of these missions is to share the gospel, but also to help with physical conditions of the group. These mission trips are often found in ‘less-than-fortunate’ areas.What are the hidden biases we may carry, as Westerners?
The reality of traveling is that one will have a bias, either good or bad. Maybe just neutral. But the fact is, one has probably heard about the area where they are traveling to, and has made certain assumptions. For example, if I mention that I live on an Indian Reservation, what feelings or images are conjured up in your mind? Based on what you see is a reflection on what you learned (or didn’t learn) and how you feel about that. It’s not just Natives. If you mention a certain city, town; even a group of people or political party (yes, that is a reality, too…) - one will have a thought toward and about them. All because we have heard something, and honestly, that may be the only education we received about them.
When we are discussing missions, how we define a mission trip, and the motive for which we are going carries what kind of biases we hold about the people we are intending to serve. Our “why” is very crucial in determining the action of sharing about Jesus. After all, if our perspective is to serve the “poor unfortunate souls” (cue Ursula’s powerhouse ballad, please) to better their present living conditions, I promise you, then the purpose of sharing the actual gospel has been missed.
Bias also affects where we choose to serve. We often are optimistic and hopeful for the gospel to be effective with a group of people that we may know little or nothing about (i.e. overseas). But if God were to say, “Hey, I want you to move to the district next door,” we often hesitate. Our negative biases are strongest concerning those who are closest to us in geography and we think we know the most about. Jonah had a problem with this when he was told to go to Nineveh. The Jewish disciples of Jesus struggled with the idea that God wanted Gentiles (i.e. Greeks and Romans...being enemies and especially, the Romans, were oppressors) to be saved, as well. We want to help the hopeless, but with all due respect, sometimes we think the hopeless are from a far off place. They may be right next door. But because we think a certain way, we refuse to go to them. All because of our bias.A Biblical Perspective on Missions
Jesus’ Commission
Reviewing Matthew 28:18-20 and Acts 1:8, the purpose of any missionary journey is to share the gospel of salvation through Jesus, making disciples and baptizing them. This is to occur in Jerusalem, Judea and Samaria, and lastly, to the ends of the earth.
Speaking to the purpose of mission work, present day (I’m going to pinpoint short-term, primarily) missions have largely emphasized the need to address the physical needs. Now, that doesn’t mean we, as Christians, shouldn’t forget the actual needs of people (see Acts 3:1-10, and Acts 6:1-7 as examples of meeting physical needs). However, what has occurred with the past influence of imperialism (focus on “bettering barbarian lives”) and the modern movement of social justice (which was predominated by Christians, but has since been taken up by the secular realm), many mission trips can look more like humanitarian efforts sprinkled with a little bit of Jesus. I wonder if Jesus’ intended death and resurrection has been lost. There is a focus on making the present world more sufficient, more comfortable and liveable. I will go into more detail in the danger of solely focusing on the physical needs of a people in the next section, but often the truth of Jesus’ redemption is not truly communicated. I am speaking to myself, in this. I will be ready to help in community efforts, but am I willing to talk about Jesus and our need for a Savior? Unfortunately, I become more quiet.
Now, for the people. Jerusalem, Judea and Samaria, and the ends of the earth. As Westerners, we, Biblically, are the ends of the earth (being that the Bible takes place in Israel, geographically). I think the commission can be misunderstood (which may be why we look toward overseas or some distant place to do missions) or some may feel left out, because they don’t feel the call to travel. Let’s put this in context. Jerusalem was the central focus of Israel; thereby - it is the hometown for the promises of God to be fulfilled. In the realm of mission, our Jerusalem is our hometown. Judea explains regionally and nationally, and the ends of the earth - obviously is overseas. All are on God’s heart to be redeemed.
Even if you don’t believe God has called you to travel to share about what Jesus’ sacrifice has done in your life, where you live presently is also a mission field. Sometimes, we think we need to go far to share about Jesus, but the truth about missions is that being missional is living life wherever you are. I had a friend who once said, “You can’t share Jesus’ love beyond, if you can’t share it right where you are.” I believe she has a great point.
So, what of Samaria? Geographically, Samaria was in the parameters of Israel. They were Israeli citizens, but...they weren’t considered full Jewish, because they were descendants of Jews who had intermarried with enemy Assyrians. According to other Israelis, Samaritans were half-breeds. I want to express the pain that is tied with how we often look at sharing the gospel. Our Samaria are the groups of people within our region or nation whom we despise for whatever “justified” reason. Whether they are a different color, different culture, support a different political stance (or worse, a political party...ah! The devil!!!!), or live in sin, or stand on things differently, due to doctrine. The truth is, we can allow our bias to influence who we think God is wanting us to share the gospel with, but the truth, His eyes may be looking upon some whom one wouldn’t ever imagine. What is your Samaria? Could God be wanting to move you to them, but your heart is closed off?
All through my high school years, my Christian friends discussed missions. Many wanted to go to Africa or China. Now, there is nothing wrong with wanting to go to those regions. In fact, God is still sending people to those places. But as a student, there was a check in my heart. Africa and China were the main two places my friends wanted to go. “What about others?” I thought, “God, I know that Africa and China need you. But everyone wants them. What about those whom no one wants to talk about? God, give me the forgotten ones?” Fast forward to when I moved to the Rez, the #1 thing I heard from my community concerning how they felt they were portrayed in politics or looked upon by our nation. Not kidding, word for word: “forgotten”. I wonder how many times God wanted to send people to Native to share His true love (opposed to the abuses that occurred previously), but because of stigmas and stereotypes, people refused? Things are slowly changing. I’m grateful to have a church family that has white and Native living together. But this is something that can be so easily missed.Taking a cue from the book of Acts
The book of Acts is 28 chapters, and based on my pastor’s sermons, it could take a year to detail the travels that Luke records. But I will give this synopsis: the purpose of the mission trips were to share about the salvation of Jesus with others. It started on a local level, and then progressed to their neighbors, and later beyond immediate borders. In record, Peter and Paul (who are the prominent missionaries stated) took time to live among those whom they ministered among. If the Church found that there were physical needs to be addressed, they were prompt in making sure that it was carried.
The Body of Christ was a family. And so they worked as a family. They would worship, pray, and eat together. When they did mission trips, there was no such thing as a short term mission trip. Granted, travel was harder than it is today. But Paul is never recorded as preaching a message one night and moving on to another place. Unless he was in mortal danger or not received, he stayed for long periods of time, because as a part of the commission - he also focused on discipleship.
The key thing about discipleship isn’t necessarily educating people about what the Bible says. The Sanhedrin (Jewish religious teachers) were WELL versed in Scripture, but many missed it when Jesus came. Discipleship is meant to walk life out. Jesus lived life with 12 apostles and others for three years. Paul took Timothy on his missionary journeys. One cannot disciple without relationship. And one cannot build a relationship if the intention of their mission trip is only to be a “drive by” preach.Practical Steps in Walking Out Missions
In the modern history of missionary work, I think we have forgotten the heart of what Jesus really wanted to portray. Unfortunately, in our efforts to share the gospel, we looked at the culture of another, within our own context, and so many Westerners confused the cultural for the religious and vice versa. I am not advocating that no one ever should change anything after giving their lives to Christ. But when one is an outsider (which is an appropriate context for an incoming missionary), it is vital to not view everything from personal habits and mores, and what one understands to be godly or ungodly (unless explicitly stated in the Bible).
For example, many missionaries denied Natives to speak their language, demanded that they cut their hair and change their clothes. They declared their dances to be demonic, and I don’t believe they understood the culture well enough to know which way was up and down. There were generations of children taken away from their parents and ripped from what they knew, because, “in the name of Jesus”, to be saved meant to make the Indian white.
Color does not equate salvation. And if we paused long enough, I think we, as Christians, would agree strongly. And yet, failing to take time to know the Native people, understand their customs or know their language cultivated a message that was not to be shared. Furthermore, Westerners deeming their culture as the “right way” also opened doors to abuses. Historically, during the Middle Ages, priests would walk up and down cobble streets whipping themselves as a means to pay penance for their sins, as an act of repentance. Is it any wonder why the boarding schools of the 1800s have been found to have beat children as a means of discipline?
With all due respect, I think it is high time that all of us look at our culture (which simply means “a way of life that includes music, art, norms, rules, clothing and religion”) and compare it with the culture revolution that Jesus was introducing with the Kingdom of Heaven. Even I, a Western American, has found that I carry wounds sent by messages by a Western mindset.
So, what are the do’s and don’ts of mission work?
First of all, I would challenge you to not do a short-term mission trip. As simple as they are, and enlightening and educational as they can be, they can short-change the overall purpose of what mission work is supposed to be. These are the problems of short-term mission trips:
1. The relationships remain superficial. Unless one makes a plan of returning to where they went, what connections are made will be minor. The people being served know the missionaries are going to leave. Yes, there can be fun times, but the trust and depth needed will not be there. Please don’t come at me with social media. The truth is that many people we add on social media, we never talk to again...unless, we see them again.
2. Short-term missions make the local people dependent on outsiders. In the Western mindset, we pride ourselves on independence. However, we like to bend the rules in an effort to help those less fortunate. When missions focus on primarily the physical realm, this is the result. We are willing to get involved in other peoples’ affairs. Aside from the historical cultural implications that this creates (as well as economic and political), we create an atmosphere where people are unable to sustain and survive their faith without us. If people are only following Jesus as long as the missionary is there, but fall away when that person leaves, then it is possible that the person’s faith was more in the missionary than in Jesus. (This is why local pastors are trying to raise up local pillars to help encourage future generations of Jesus followers, see Luke 8:4-8 for importance of discipleship.)
3. Often the enlightenment about God’s character is often portrayed in how He blessed you through the hospitality of the local people. Though I have since learned to receive blessing (because, I taught myself that I should never be in need), to see that God’s lesson for me is how much He loves me by getting something from the people I’m supposed to be ministering to is still a selfish mentality. Their gratitude can become a pat on the back. On the alternative, I want to challenge you in the way my youth pastor challenged my generation: what is a lesson that God wants to give you that you can take home and continue? Rather than looking at the blessings God can give you on a mission, what are ways that He wants to grow you? And frankly, His growth lessons prove to be the best blessings in life.
4. Becoming a system of evangelism without the roots of discipleship. Evangelism is a great gift that brings a mass of people together to hear about Jesus. But discipleship’s definition is a lifelong faith. I will say this: if you are taking part in a short-term mission trip, please don’t guilt yourself in believing you made a mistake. You still can be active and we will welcome you. I will advise you to find local ministries to partner with. When you make connections with people, refer them to the local ministries that are going on. If you do add someone on social media, attempt to stay in contact.
Now for the do’s of missions:
1. Be open to a long-term commitment. Years, not just weeks or months show dedication. It will also allow for the time to reveal personal motivation. When I first moved to the Rez, my students wanted to know why I was here. Was it just because of the money? The experience? But their greatest concern was if I was going to stay, since so many teachers had left.
A doctor decided to become a missionary to China in the height of Imperialism. A tall, British man, he became sensitive to the Chinese culture. Not only learning their language, he also wore their traditional clothes, grew out his hair, and spent 51 of his 73 years living and serving the Chinese people. There would have been no way that he would have done ministry in China that long, if his motivation was to make the Chinese white people. He truly loved the Chinese as his own. He became the founder of the China Inland Mission, and his name was Hudson Taylor.
2. Refrain from becoming their savior and present them to the Savior. Mission work is not about cultural conversion, but so that people can come to know Christ relationally and be saved from their sin. If a sin or biblical concern does come up (and it will), remember to walk with them. But like Samwise Gamgee, carry them in prayer, but not their burden. On the note of physical needs, support conversations and listen to their ideas of what solutions would work. Remember that the Holy Spirit is the one that convicts and renews our spirit. Something that has helped me to approach cross-cultural missions is to remember, “Is this issue a Biblical one? Is it a heaven/hell issue?” This perspective has helped me to not be judgmental and deem something that may be counter to how I grew up. There are different cultures, and different doesn’t mean demonic. Furthermore, it is likely in any society to find Christians from the same culture to take different stances on certain aspects, and they have their reasons. Keep the main thing the main thing.
3. Listen as much, if not more, than you speak. Learn about the person, and from where they are coming. By understanding the culture - which doesn’t mean tribal traditionalism, but generally, the way of life. For example, nonwestern communities are very collectivist, but Western communities are individualistic. Humor and how they approach things may be different, as well.
4. Ask for God’s heart for His people. Knowing His heart will bring the focus of His kingdom as central to what is done. One must be around them long enough that their laughter and tears are personal. Mission work has failed when it is people serving “other” people. But when one walks life with them, they become their people. I have buried four students. Those were MY students. I’ve been to two weddings. My friends’ joy was my own, as well. When my community called for public prayer and protests, I joined, because their concerns became MY concerns, as well. I am not trying to make this about me. However, because I have looked at my community as my own, I am not willing to give up God’s heart for His people.
5. Don’t be afraid to admit biases and be willing to learn. Everyone grew up with a culture. There are things to find different, and sometimes one will find parallels. It is important to understand how they clash or converge when met. It doesn’t necessarily mean something bad happened. It’s just different perspectives. For example, I have learned from the Native culture to not freak out if I leave the house later than I want. But honestly, I still like to have a plan and leave ahead of time. In continued conversations, I am sure that some of my Native friends may bring up to me where I may not be thinking with the correct perspective, because I am only looking through Western eyes. But the key is, I need to have a soft heart. After all, historical wounds will not heal with walls of offense.
6. Refrain from feeling like you have to have a title. What I mean by this, don’t feel the pressure to have “minister” be your title to be on mission. Unfortunately, even today, many missionaries are unrecognized, because they are not “official”. And I have a friend who is a housewife and shares Jesus by being compassionate to the homeless who knock on her door for a meal. Another friend homeschools her kids, and cries with those who are hurting, opening her home to anyone in need. Another is a nurse with the biggest smile. Another works in schools. Another takes time to hang out with the youth and teaches on-the-job training for construction. Another is a counselor at a recovery center. Another is a bus driver. Another is a hair dresser. Another works at a store. The list goes on, but what I want to show is that Christ can be shared wherever Christ can be found. And if everyone was a pastor, how would a community see Jesus in the inter-weavings in a community?
7. Lastly, be willing to admit one’s own story. Moving from the Rez, I would have to admit that my greatest regret is that I became so focused on what was “right”, and wasn’t willing to look at my own story, that I couldn’t connect with my students’ brokenness like I should’ve. It hasn’t been until the last couple years that I was in a room with other women, carrying their own hurts, that I realized that my story may be different, but my need for a Savior is just as great as theirs. When sharing about Jesus, that is where it easily goes awry. The focus on actions, and how one can make their life “good” can often mask the real issues that Jesus wants to address. I have since taken the position that I no longer can point the finger and say, “You need Jesus.” Truth is, I am human and apt to fall and fail just as much as anyone (no matter if their sin seems more grave than mine; Jesus looks at the heart). I must tell people, “We all need Jesus. The only way I am finding freedom is because of Him.” Note the present tense of that statement. I once tried to make sure that I wouldn’t sin again or make a mistake, but that isn’t possible. Walking with Jesus is a life-long pursuit. And if I want people to know Christ, I must be aware of my own constant need for Him. Plus, being honest about one’s own story opens a door of compassion to show and share about Christ. None of us are without need for Jesus.
A New Perspective
Missions have been dominated as a Western enterprise. Our historical perspective has shown a sense of superiority, because the cultural has gotten in the way of Jesus. Things have been changing recently, and what is amazing is to see that the places that once were the prime places for missionary journeys have subsequently been raising strong churches grounded in Christ. Ironically, the Western world has since become the most unchurched regions in the world, comparatively. The ones who once sent word about Jesus are now in need of Him. Which makes me ask, “Would I be okay if someone from another culture and people came to where I lived to share about Jesus in a way that I hadn’t heard before?”
Gulp.
Are we ready for that? So much of the Western mindset is to pull oneself up by their own bootstraps. We pride ourselves in our mores and ideologies of being the greatest nation...the idea that we may actually need other nations to help us remember Jesus may be a bit humbling. I think we may like the idea that we are the face of Jesus so much that sometimes we want others to look to us. Maybe that is wrong, but perhaps, it is a good check.
And yet, China is now sending missionaries to the United States.
What if a reservation no longer needed white missionaries living among them? Could white folks be okay with that? Truth is, I wonder if we would be questioning our purpose, and asking God for a new assignment. But let me give a new perspective of what mission work should look like: What if all the work of traveling was to make sure that the Church family was as big as can be, and as any family details, we learn and lean on one another?
This summer, we had Indian Youth Camp. The pastor for the teen services introduced himself, and then said the following. “Many see the reservations as the mission fields, but I believe that reservations will become the mission [forces; sending people out].” What is amazing is I volunteer at the camp to serve Native students, but often the messages that were preached had taught me something, as well. I ministered, but I was the one being ministered by the “group” of people to whom I was ministering (if that makes sense).
Truth is, God has created all groups of people and has revealed Himself in specific ways to each group of people (see Romans 1:20). Because mission work has been dominated by the Western world and western mindsets; because there was an emphasis on cultural appropriation, the other ways that God has revealed Himself were unrevealed for the longest time.
However, the Church is multicultural. In Revelation 7:9-12, John describes every nation present, worshipping Jesus. We won’t look alike. We won’t sound alike. But we all are children of God, because of Jesus. Now, when Jesus came to bring the Kingdom of Heaven on earth, I wonder if part of that picture was to look like Revelation. What if instead of missions being about one culture teaching all the others, what if it looked more like we discipled together and learned from one another? There are things that God revealed to the Western world that isn’t specific to other cultures. But another fact is that God has revealed things to other cultures that we miss out on, as Westerners.
For example, it was in the white world I learned about Jesus. But it was in the Native world that I learned about grace. That may seem counterintuitive, if one has read the Bible. But think about this. Maybe the Western value of individual responsibility may be teaching Christians to overcorrect to live by a saved by works mentality. Honestly, that has been a major root to some of the insecurities I grew up with. I couldn’t be honest about the things I struggled with, because I knew better, so I should have done better. However...living among Natives, their way of life of being open about things that they struggle with and not wanting to hide things taught me it was okay to admit my imperfections. And by admitting my imperfections, I admit my consistent and forever need for Jesus which will keep me close to Him.
I can’t wait for the day when the Church can truly be a family. We can live among one another, minister to one another, pray with one another, eat together, and receive God’s truth from one another..no matter the culture or color. What an amazing and beautiful picture.
Other Resources:
Corbett, S., & Fikkert, B. (2012). When helping hurts: how to alleviate poverty without hurting the poor-- and yourself. Moody Publishers.
Richards, E. R., & O'Brien, B. J. (2012). Misreading Scripture with Western eyes: removing cultural blinders to better understand the Bible. IVP Books.
Taylor, H., & Taylor, H. (1965). J. Hudson Taylor a biography: God's man in China. Moody Press.